The Mom Bikini: Real or Myth

I haven’t worn a bikini since 2003, and even then it was for one fleeting weekend when I was feeling unreasonably confident. The pictures from that trip say so. We were at the beach, I was feeling all hawt and … Read More

Food Panic. PANIC!

Anyway, I’m still trying to digest everything I’ve seen, heard, read re: the fact that EVERYTHING I’VE BELIEVED ABOUT FOOD & DIET IS A LIE!Read More

My Gift to the Mommies of the World. You’re Welcome.

(c) Conor Lawless

Ever look at your friends’ houses and think, “I’m a total failure as a wife and/or mother?” My friend Stacy’s house makes me crazy. She has a daughter nearly the same age as Charlie and her house is always tidy and clean. I’ve never even seen a stray hair on her bathroom counter. Seriously??? She’s also a health nut and cooks every night. They rarely eat out. Why am I even friends with her? Read More

The Miracle Flu Diet

Photo Courtesy of Evil Erin

Michele: Remember the prom? You got so thin by then.
Romy: Oh, I know. I was so lucky getting mono. That was like the best diet ever.

- Romy and Michelle’s High School Reunion (1997)

So I’ve been working my arse off for the last year to lose weight. It’s not just baby weight. I had gained a good fifty ell bees before I got pregnant. Add the forty baby pounds and HOLY SCHNIKES! That’s Read More

I Hate It When “They” Are Right

“When you eat when you are not hungry you are using food as a drug.” Read More